Road Ravings: 196,456
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?
I don't want to say that The Sixers have supernatural powers. I won't go there, although maybe you would assume that the band can cure the blind and heal the sick. Maybe inadvertently we can, I have no proof one way or the other... There is something I do have proof of, something that comes pretty close to supernatural powers stemming from an alternative dimension*. Enter Twighlight Zone theme song... OK, now lower the volume and wait for it... wait for it. Stephen Kellogg and The Sixers can make The San Diego Padres win! Yes, that is correct, yes we can!
Let me give you some background on these Padres. Their inaugural season in Major League Baseball was 1969. They have yet to win a world series in their 40 year history, losing in two world series in 1984 and 1998, respectively. They are also one of four teams (including my blundering New York Mets) who have never had a pitcher throw a no hitter for the organization. And at a 28-31 record, it seemed as though San Diego could use a little help. I and the other Sixers sensed this as we walked onto Petco Field to sing the national anthem.
I'm not quite sure what happened next, but I think I saw The Goose's eyes roll into the back of his head while SK clicked his heels together. I wasn't too sure what was going on because I was sprinkling fairy dust everywhere. Through our angelic voices and cathedral sounding harmonies, we blessed the game in the name of the San Diego Padres. They pulled out a come from behind win against the Arizona Diamondbacks by a score of 6-4. Throughout the weekend while in San Diego, people approached us saying "great job" and "thank you." All we could really do was say "you're welcome." or "I know, can I have my slice of pizza please?" Then it occurred to us; We are stars, we are healers and we are going to be RICH. We quickly booked time in one of the most expensive recording studios in San Diego and recorded our flawless rendition of Francis Scott Key's hit "The Star Spangled Banner". Only one problem Francis, this is our hit now...
Stephen Kellogg and The Sixers, starting now, will only sing national anthems for a specific fee agreed upon by management and a specific sporting team. We feel as though our services are needed as much as wins are needed in the world of sports... they are very much needed indeed. And for a price. Sure, we like to play our songs, ones that we've written and sometimes tunes that we haven't written and I'm not saying that we won't ever do that again. What I am saying is that we are officially a NATIONAL ANTHEM BAND ONLY. We enjoyed this experience and use of power so much, we know we can make a killing in this industry... I hope you all understand. Our forthcoming album "The Bear" will be 12-13 tracks of us singing the national anthem in different keys, time signatures, eclectic styles (maybe a samba version?) and in different stadiums around the world. It's release has been postponed until the year 2015.
The morning after our godlike performance at Petco Field we received a call from the front office of the Padres asking us a question and I quote "You guys were good luck for us, can you sing the anthem again??" Laying together in our queen size bed we chuckled, not for free, not for free...
boots
* I just made up that term and have no idea what it means exactly...